All posts tagged
body-parts
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July 20, 2012I’m Going to Replace My Hands With Hammers, So Help Me God
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February 3, 2011I Dance Like I Have Two Left Feet
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October 29, 2009List: Fourteen Nipple Synonyms for Romance Novelists
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December 8, 2008Monologue: A Candiru Issues an Apology From Inside Your Urethra
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June 13, 2008Van Gogh’s Ears
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May 20, 2005List: Things That Are Just Barely Thicker Than Peter Gallagher’s Eyebrows
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April 26, 2005Open Letter: An Open Letter to the Dead Joints in My Feet
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April 13, 2005Open Letter: An Open Letter to the Fake Boobs My Husband Bought His Ex Girlfriend
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May 3, 2004List: Sensations I Would Have Gladly Endured for a Full Thirty Minutes in Lieu of the Eight Months of Constant Discomfort Resulting from a Pinched Sciatic Nerve (the Longest Nerve in the Body)
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July 7, 2001List: Things I Have Had in My Nose, and If They Got There Intentionally or Accidentally
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January 2, 2019I Don’t Hate Women Candidates — I Just Hated Hillary and Coincidentally I’m Starting to Hate Elizabeth Warren
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January 9, 2019I Used My Wife’s Vibrating Dildo to Achieve My First Prostate Orgasm and Now I’m In Narnia and I Can’t Get Back Home
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January 4, 2019I Watched the Video of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Dancing In College, and Now I Understand the Necessity of Free-Market Economics
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December 29, 2018List: If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers