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All posts tagged
holidays
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December 22, 2021Ten Things to Say Instead of “No Thanks, I Don’t Drink”
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December 17, 2021A Review of My Parents’ Holiday Performance of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?
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December 16, 2021Sugar Cookie Toast Crunch Cereal
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November 30, 2021We’re a Small, Family-Owned Business and We No Longer Value Your Feedback
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December 14, 2020So, You Bought an Ornamental Nut Sack
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December 11, 2020Ugly Holiday Sweaters for 2020
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October 29, 2020Out-of-Season Christmas Music Is a Menace, and the Christmas Commission Will Protect You
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July 3, 2020The Fourth of July: Myth vs. Fact
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July 3, 2020We Apologize That Instead of July Fourth Bunting, We Accidentally Shipped You a Box Full of Snakes
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July 3, 2020It’s Time to Sign the Declaration of Independence, and I, Elbridge Gerry, Will Have the Biggest Signature of All
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May 13, 2022Ten Possibilities the Applebee’s Waitress Considers Before It Occurs to Her the Women in Booth Fourteen Might Be a Couple with Two Children
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November 13, 2018If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers
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May 2, 2022Welcome to the Middle-Aged Restaurant. Please Stop Complaining
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May 18, 2022A Passenger’s One-Star Review of the Trolley Ride from the Trolley Problem
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May 20, 2022How Oizys, Greek Goddess of Misery, Spends Her Sundays
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May 20, 2022My Prediction That Political Attacks Against Me Will Escalate Has Nothing to Do With Me Exposing Myself to a Flight Attendant
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May 20, 2022Diseases All Woodmont Alumni from 1971 to 2021 Should Immediately Be Screened For
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May 20, 2022Babies Need to Pull Themselves Up by Their Tiny Bootstraps