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All posts tagged
holidays
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November 30, 2021We’re a Small, Family-Owned Business and We No Longer Value Your Feedback
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December 14, 2020So, You Bought an Ornamental Nut Sack
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December 11, 2020Ugly Holiday Sweaters for 2020
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October 29, 2020Out-of-Season Christmas Music Is a Menace, and the Christmas Commission Will Protect You
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July 3, 2020The Fourth of July: Myth vs. Fact
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July 3, 2020We Apologize That Instead of July Fourth Bunting, We Accidentally Shipped You a Box Full of Snakes
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July 3, 2020It’s Time to Sign the Declaration of Independence, and I, Elbridge Gerry, Will Have the Biggest Signature of All
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April 20, 2020Hi, I’m Jesus, and When I Get Back, I Want All the Eggs Hidden
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December 20, 2019A Holiday Guide to Weeping Pillows
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October 14, 2019Federal Holidays Are Not For Preserving Democracy. They’re For Celebrating Perpetrators of Genocide
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April 25, 2025This Five-Hundred-Word Bumper Sticker on My Tesla Explains Why I’m Not a Bad Person
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May 8, 2025An Open Letter to Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Who Thinks My Daughter Is a Tragedy
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May 6, 2025Introducing Our University’s New, Totally Reasonable Criteria for Promotion and Tenure
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May 5, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes