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September 10, 2015Things a Non-Football Fan Could Say While Watching a Game That Will Make True Fans Accept You as One of Their Own
June 4, 2014Please Stop Blatantly Plagiarizing Ace Ventura: Pet Detective In Your Workshop Submissions
January 28, 2014Bitchslap: A Column About Women and Fighting
November 15, 2013Reviews of Self-Help Books by Professional Athletes: Miami’s Preeminent Cheerleader Magnet: A Review of Next Question by Drew Rosenhaus
June 24, 2013Non-Essential Mnemonics: “No, you idiot. The Bolshevik Regime tanked because Bolshevik ministers didn’t facilitate market capitalism. Haha…socialism? Seriously?! Poor people should just save some money”
February 9, 2005NFL Mascots That Could Not Actually Wear A Football Helmet Without Suffocating