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All posts tagged
movies
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August 7, 2006A Lost Scene Involving Louis, a Turkey Character Cut During the Final Edit of Charlotte’s Web
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May 16, 2006Chuck Norris Candidly Speaks Out On Torture as He Wins a Lifetime Achievement Award for Choreography at the First Annual Waco, Texas, Film Festival
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May 3, 2006The Bruckheimer Quatrains
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April 10, 2006Possible “Surprise” Endings to the New Samuel L. Jackson Film Snakes On a Plane
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January 30, 2006Scenes From The Lord Of The Rings That Might Have Been Used as Setups for Bad Commercials Had the Filmmakers Not Respected the Material
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January 20, 2006Movie Reviews By the City of Los Angeles Itself
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November 22, 2004Tales of Erotica: Chuck Norris and Me
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October 6, 2004Unsuccessful Movie-Merchandising Attempts
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October 5, 2004Scenes From a Blockbuster Action Movie Featuring a Technology Expert With Approximately My Own Real-Life Skill Level
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September 15, 2003Unused Audio Commentary By Jayson Blair and Stephen Glass, Recorded Summer 2003, for The Goonies Special Gen-X Edition DVD, Part Two
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January 22, 2025This Is How You Normalize Performing a Fascist Gesture
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January 15, 2025Signs You Are a Gen-Xer Who’s About to Turn Sixty
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October 11, 2006Back from Yet Another Globetrotting Adventure, Indiana Jones Checks His Mail and Discovers That His Bid for Tenure Has Been Denied
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January 15, 2025A Marriage Proposal Spoken Entirely in Office Jargon
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February 5, 2025Here at DOGE, We’ve Streamlined Every Aspect of America’s Collapse
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February 5, 2025An Open Letter to the Old Man Who Bartered with My Cancer-Patient Daughter at the Community Yard Sale Fundraiser
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February 4, 2025An Accurate Organizational Chart of Your University
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February 4, 2025If Crooks Were Studying My Every Move to Pull an Ocean’s 11–Style Heist on Me