Monologue: Morgan Freeman Buys a Pop-A-Shot Machine
by Greg Ruehlmann (7/13/2005)

List: Things Pandora Could Have Opened That Wouldn’t Have Produced Such Unpleasant Results
by Devin McGinty (7/12/2005)

Sestina: Coon Was Here
by Chip Livingston (7/12/2005)

International Pamphlets for Tourists: Great Moments in Azeri Baseball
by Andrew Golden (7/12/2005)

List: Unhelpful Clues Given by Jan-Michael Vincent During an October 1983 Taping of The New $25,000 Pyramid Where the Category to Be Guessed Was “Things You Do at a Party”
by Aaron Starmer (7/11/2005)

Open Letters: An Open Letter to My Ability to Lose Interest in Things Easily
by Douglas Greuloch (7/11/2005)

Excerpts From the Diary of an Aspiring Death-Metal Frontman
by Jesse Singal (7/8/2005)

List: My Personal Mottoes
by Brian Beatty (7/7/2005)

List: What to Think About When Two “Grown Adults” Come and Complain to You About How They Cannot Get Along With Each Other at Work
by Dave Best (7/7/2005)

List: Things My Family Prefers Over Gay Marriage
by Will Bilyeu (7/7/2005)

Re: Hardy Boys Manuscript Submission
by Jay Dyckman (7/7/2005)

Expert Help for Your Fantasy Baseball Franchise: The Benefits of Receiving No Media Coverage Despite Having the Best Record in Baseball
by Rick Paulas (7/7/2005)

Sestina: Alienation Sestina
by Chris Stroffolino (7/6/2005)

An At First Semi-Scientific but Then Increasingly Fanboy Attempt to Identify Which Visible High-Gravity Star Cluster Is the Star Wars Galaxy
by Robert Isenberg (7/6/2005)

World-Historical Cheneys
by B.R. Cohen (7/5/2005)

Five People Just as Doctrinaire and Tiresome as Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia Speculate on How He Got That Way
by Bob Woodiwiss (7/1/2005)

Expert Help for Your Fantasy Baseball Franchise: Indisputable Roster of News Hunters, Gatherers, Reporters, and Talking Heads—Female Edition
by Rick Paulas (7/1/2005)

The Internal Monologue Of A Progressive Rock Fan Choosing His Wedding Song
by G. Xavier Robillard and Wayne Gladstone (6/30/2005)

List: Authorial Candy Bars, With Their Respective Tag Lines, That Weren’t as Successful as the Oh Henry! Candy Bar
by Jonathan Shipley (6/29/2005)

List: Christmas Presents I Would Consider Giving Mr. Belvedere Were He My Personal Manservant
by CT Kelley (6/29/2005)

Sestina: Multiform
by Florence Cassen Mayers (6/29/2005)

Spy vs. Spy: The Unused Treatments
by Seth Reiss (6/29/2005)

Things You Can Learn About The Plot Of The Next Harry Potter Book Just By Looking At The Cover Art
by Matthew A. Cohen (6/28/2005)

Dispatches From a Public Librarian: Dispatch 18: Adventures in MySpace
by Scott Douglas (6/28/2005)

How to Beat Off Invaders From Space; or, What to Do When the Aliens Come
by Dave Johnston (6/27/2005)

List: The Mall’s Banana Republics for the New Millennium
by Kate Hahn (6/24/2005)

List: The Extended Family of Thespian Rip Torn
by Patrick Cassels (6/24/2005)

List: Future Winners of the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest
by Roy Futterman (6/24/2005)

Open Letters: An Open Letter to My Sonicare Electric Toothbrush
by John Whitehead (6/24/2005)

Kevin Dolgin Tells You About Places You Should Go In Europe: A Slow Boat to Japan
by Kevin Dolgin (6/23/2005)

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As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, the Believer, and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. We’re also transitioning to a nonprofit and would greatly appreciate your help. You can support us today by making a donation.