ARCHIVE

“Rockin’ It, Frat Party Style!”: A Short Story Geared to College Students, Written By a 30-Something Author
by Mike Sacks (1/14/2005)

It’s A Lucky Thing For Stem Cell Research That The Following Passages Aren’t In The Bible
by David Ng (1/12/2005)

Sestina: The Vision
by Lewis Turco (1/12/2005)

E Mail Shorthand That Civil War Soldiers Would Likely Have Used In Letters Home Had The Technology Been Available To Them
by Rob Eccles (1/11/2005)

Ladies and Gentlemen, This Is Your Captain Speaking
by Jason Lathrop (1/10/2005)

Dispatches From a Real McSweeney: Cappadocia, Xenophon, The Priest, and All That
by Timothy McSweeney (1/9/2005)

Kevin Dolgin Tells You About Places You Should Go In Europe: The Third Tower Up From the Road: Huanghuacheng, China
by Kevin Dolgin (1/8/2005)

List: Alternative Punishments for the Monkey, Seeing How Spanking is Cruel
by Rob Sears (1/7/2005)

List: Gentrification of Popular Rap Lyrics
by Cougar Moxley (1/7/2005)

List: “Before-and-After” Puzzles Deemed Unsuitable for Use by the Producers of Wheel of Fortune
by Steve Krodman (1/7/2005)

iReel: A User’s Guide
by Jeremy Richards (1/6/2005)

List: Ill-Fated Ideas Borne of a Hallmark Brainstorming Session
by Tim Cigelske (1/5/2005)

List: A List of Actual Quotes Taken From the Directions and Mission Statements of Organic Products Belonging to My Vegan Roommate
by Kate Brown (1/5/2005)

List: Two Bugs on Display at the Montreal Insectarium, the First of Which I Thought Very Impressive Until I Saw the Second
by Dan Guterman (1/5/2005)

Dan Kennedy Solves Your Problems With Paper
by Dan Kennedy (1/5/2005)

I Was Not Invited Back to That School
by John Moe (1/4/2005)

Open Letters: An Open Letter to Whoever Broke Into My Car This Morning
by Laura C. Winther (1/4/2005)

Short Essays on Favorite Songs, Inspired by Nick Hornby’s Songbook: “Santa Monica” by Everclear
by Jennifer Epel (1/3/2005)

George W. Bush Quotations in Which the Words “God” or “The Almighty” or “The Almighty God” Are Replaced by Famous Names Chosen at Random From the ’80s Edition of Trivial Pursuit
by John Wanniger (1/3/2005)

Sestina: Recurring Dream
by Jonah Winter (1/3/2005)

Reviews of New Food
by Various New Food Tasters (12/31/2004)

Letters to McSweeney’s
by Readers of McSweeney's (12/31/2004)

Certain Things Have Come to My Attention
by Sean Carman (12/23/2004)

Open Letters: An Open Letter to My Turtle
by Michael Liska III (12/23/2004)

Ghost Stories With Hidden Agendas: Where Is My Golden Arm?
by Karen Sneider (12/22/2004)

Sestina: Arnaut Daniel: The Firm Desire
by Garrick Davis (12/22/2004)

List: Alternatives to “Opening a Can o’ Whupass” for the Less Confrontationally Inclined
by Ian Carey (12/21/2004)

List: Richard Rodgers’ Neighborhood
by Sam Thielman (12/21/2004)

List: Popular Songs Renamed Along the Lines of the Cattlemen’s Beef Board Ad Campaign “Beef, It’s What’s for Dinner.”
by Geoff Smith (12/21/2004)

List: Culinary Trends That Never Quite Caught On
by Chris Steck and Magaret Steck (12/21/2004)

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As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, the Believer, and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. We’re also transitioning to a nonprofit and would greatly appreciate your help. Click the button to donate. Thank you!