Advertisement for chili-filled hotdog
Voice over: First we filled them with cheese, now, say hello to Hormel’s Chili-Filled Franks!
An animated lightning bolt strikes one of the dogs, thus causing the item to burst open and void its chili-like insides.
My father: Gross
Cable access program: Kickin’ Back
Show hostess Loretta interviews one of the local homeless people identified as “Hotbox.”
Loretta: How many years were you a stuntman? Any movies that we’ve…
Loretta: And what about the military, were you in the service?
My father: You have got to be kidding me.
Common holiday advertisement for Coke
Polar bears toss beach ball in the arctic. Beach ball falls into water where a seal returns it to the bears. For its effort, seal is served a Coke.
My father: Riiiiiigggghhhht.
HBO Saturday Night Movie
Voiceover: Next up, Black Moon Rising with Tommy Lee Jones and Linda Hamilton.
Voiceover: This movie has been rated R.
My father: This has Linda Hamilton in it, and she’s bound to take her clothes off. Go to your room for a while.
M*A*S*H, the movie
My father: This was before the show. This was also the first time that I ever heard an actor say “fuck.”
The first Cannonball Run movie. Jack Elam extends a very long middle finger
Jack Elam: Take one of these and call me in the morning.
My father: In the sixties, I raced a real one of these with your half-brother. Let me assure you that this kind of behavior would have gotten us killed.
Willie Nelson performs his duet with Julio Iglesias, “To All the Girls I’ve Loved Before”
My father: It’s Willie and Julio “Eagleass.” (snicker)