Water Fountain #344,672
Verna Montessori School, Butler, OH
(2010 Assessment: Cold)

Fountain has a wheel-like dial that dispenses water into an old-looking white porcelain tub—both signs of a warmer water fountain. However, the water temperature can get as low as 50.7 degrees. In fact, water temperature in this fountain has decreased .04 degrees since 2008, a very good sign, and possibly indicative of a trend. Twenty years ago, then 6-year-old student David Stern called this water fountain “gross” and would often venture to the school’s second floor to use what was known amongst students as “The Good Water Fountain” (Water Fountain #21,984, pg. 322 of report, 2010 Assessment: Cold). When asked which water fountain is colder, the upstairs one or the downstairs one, current students now deem both fountains equal. Theories as to why the temperature has steadily decreased in fountain #344,672 vary.

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Water Fountain #82,074
Ground Floor of Scottdale YMCA, Scottdale, PA
(2010 Assessment: Very Cold)

Classic, really cold water fountain with metal button technology near its spout that, when pressed, dispenses very cold water. Is the type of water fountain that, during one’s approach to the fountain, one truly knows that he or she is in store for a very cold drink of water. Water fountain occasionally produces a whirring-to-life sound, which instills a sort of confidence that there is some sort of cooling mechanism at work. What is interesting is that the water fountain directly next to it, #548,521, dispenses water at a lower pressure gradient, and a temperature three degrees warmer. Perhaps this is because this fountain is approximately 8 inches shorter? While theories on temperature and pressure differences vary, what cannot be avoided is that the lines for the very cold water fountain tend to be much longer.

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Water Fountain #741
Law offices of Tiberio and Tiberio,
Fort Wayne, IN
(2010 Assessment: Erratic)

A wall-mounted model with big grey buttons on the side with hand imprints indicating where one’s hands should be pressed to properly dispense water. Note: Hands do not need to fit directly on imprints in order for fountain to properly function. Overall, the fountain is unpredictable, a wildcard. We have found that temperature fluctuates between water so warm that users walk away visibly disappointed, or so cold that users with sensitive teeth recoil in pain. Theories on violent swings in water temperature vary. One idea, that the water fountain is colder in winter and warmer in the summer, was debunked when Deborah Winslow, 53, took a sip from the fountain on a hot July day and said to no one in particular, “Pretty cold.” Water fountain has been marked for further study.

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Water Fountain #6,843
Lincoln Park, Chicago, IL
(2010 Assessment: Warm, Disappointing)

Despite a cobblestone design that gives the appearance of a classic look, this water fountain is very bad. Based on the way the sun beats down on it, and how it sits by itself in the middle of the park with no visible cords coming out of it, users seem to know the water temperature will be extremely warm. We have seen very thirsty people bypass this water fountain on the hottest of days, as it seems to have built up a pretty solid reputation as a bad water fountain. Users tend to disrespect it by spitting their gum and mucous into it. On a personal note, we believe this treatment is justified. We would like to destroy this water fountain.