Toyota Prius seeks irritating pseudoenvironmentalist for smug attitude and poorly informed dinner-party rant on Middle Eastern oil politics.

California relocation for “fresh start” seeks disaster-prone individual for postmove loneliness and employment difficulties followed by crippling “sleep all day” depression episode.

Cringe-inducing racist remark seeks grandfather for slip of the tongue during family get-together.

Tedious recounting of last night’s nonsensical dream seeks potential suitor on first date for obliteration of second-date possibility.

Surprisingly explicit and seemingly unending movie sex scene seeks family for very uncomfortable viewing moment.