My family and I escaped the cold for a glorious week at Punta Grande. My kids loved all the activities, and my husband and I loved the tiki bar at the pool! The staff was so friendly, too. Especially Miguel, who I had sex with. Highly recommend this place!

- - -

I surprised my boyfriend for his birthday last month with a trip to Punta Grande, then he surprised me by having tons of sex with Miguel. Wow! Happy birthday!

- - -

If you’re looking for a resort to have intercourse with Miguel, this place is perfect! The margaritas aren’t too shabby either!

- - -

Traveling to Punta Grande over Christmas break was rough. Two canceled flights, plus a lost bag! By the time we got to the hotel, not a single one of us was in the mood to have sex with Miguel. A couple of tequila shots later, however, and we were all basically doing him. Hidden gem!

- - -

The water sports at Punta Grande were top-notch. We snorkeled in the reef right off the hotel beach — the water was super clear and had tons of tropical fish! But not so many that it made it tough to bone Miguel down there. Paradise!

- - -

I’ve never even been to Punta Grande, but I have to say that it’s really inappropriate the way all these reviewers are talking about this Miguel person. I mean, he’s a human being for Christ’s sake. Seems like people have forgotten that.

UPDATE: Went to Punta Grande. Holy hell, that guy can F—K!

- - -

My girlfriends and I stayed in a junior suite at Punta Grande last month. We loved it! Especially the Merengue lessons on the beach every day! “Merengue” is Miguel’s word for oral, FYI.

- - -

Shout out to Miguel for all the screwing!

- - -

One amazing highlight from our stay at Punta Grande was the nature hike led by Miguel. We even got to see a troop of spider monkeys in the rainforest! They were so cute. And curious! They came right up to us and just stared like they’d never seen anyone do reverse cowgirl before.

- - -

We recently had our wedding at Punta Grande! The ceremony on the beach was magical! I still have this beautiful image in my mind of the sun setting sun just as the minister and Miguel were going at it.

- - -

It rained almost every single day during my bachelor party weekend at Punta Grande. Thankfully, the resort had plenty of indoor activities planned, like movies and games. Kidding! We totally banged Miguel! Miss your body, amigo!

- - -

We loved the authentic vibe of the traditional Mexican palapa roofs at Punta Grande. It transported us to a time long ago when people were having sex with Miguel’s great great grandfather.

- - -

We’ve only been back home from Punta Grande for three days and I already miss it. Thankfully I have a few souvenirs to remind me of the amazing things I did there, like this positive pregnancy test. Gracias, Miguel!