Police brutality: Ask everyone in the audience to touch the small of your back.

Moving the U.S. Embassy to Jerusalem: Take three hours to walk from one side of your cubicle to the other.

The U.S. backing out of the Paris Agreement: Deconstruct a spatial cube in front of a hot-dog stand.

The FCC and net-neutrality: Use a motion-tracking computer program to translate your instant composition dance into floating dark circles.

Repealing Obamacare: Suspend yourself from a harness made of paper clips and breathe arrhythmically.

The Republican tax plan: Stand in the corner of a crowded elevator and scream “POST!” while making small counter-clockwise movements with your pelvis.

Sexual assault: Practice authentic movement.

Fox News: Play with falling and recovering in the bodega down the street and offer to mop the floor with your hair.

Puerto Rico’s hurricane recovery: Put on every jacket you own and research the space between your ears.

Gun rights in light of mass shootings: Make a Raspberry Smoothie using only your sitz bones.

Creationism being taught in schools: Explore homo-lateral movement completely naked at an Arby’s.

Defunding Planned Parenthood: Generate movement from an IKEA instruction manual for the Poäng.

Tomi Lahren: Run at full speed into a fire exit and then perform a Vinyasa-Flow-Yoga-for-Weight-Loss class.

Russian intervention: Assume a difficult position and, without blinking, stare at the audience until your entire body is shaking and tears are rolling down your cheeks.

Government shutdowns: Shake in a psycho-shamanic ritual in the middle of five o’clock traffic.

Shitholes: Finding the tongue-sphincter connection use idiokinesis to make your ass-hole wide enough to encompass the entire world.