Blondie: You have made a prank call with a Speak ’n Spell.
Talking Heads: You have read several books while jogging.
Spandau Ballet: You know what Rolfing is.
Happy Mondays: You have accidentally put hand sanitizer on a hot dog.
Sugarcubes: You have had several marshmallow burns in hard-to-reach places.
Blow Monkeys: You have accidentally braided a stranger’s hair.
Modern English: Your clock radio smells like lotion and barbecue sauce.
The The: You have eaten cereal out of a hubcap or helmet.
Echo and the Bunnymen: You have put a Han Solo toy on top of a Princess Leia toy.
Talk Talk: You have put a Princess Leia toy on top of a Boba Fett toy.
Einstürzende Neubauten: You have put a Snake Eyes toy on top of a Cobra Commander toy.
Kraftwerk: You know what UNESCO stands for.
Love and Rockets: You have stored gummy worms in an empty tape case.
Night Ranger: You have temporarily blinded a guinea pig with a laser pointer.
Bon Jovi: You have smoked a rolled-up bus transfer.
Dokken: You have thrown up in a tuba or trombone.
Ratt: You have accidentally snorted a line of Cascade.
WASP: You have snorted several lines of Cascade on purpose.
Stryper: You think Stryper is WASP.
Sisters of Mercy: You have tried to freeze a bag of cigarette smoke.
The Church: You have drawn a face on an apple or orange with a Sharpie.
Kate Bush: You have worn snow boots and a bikini at the same time.
Gloria Estefan: You have mixed a daiquiri in a hotel-room vase.
Billy Ocean: You have repaired a bongo drum with duct tape.
Cinderella: You have played basketball with a deflated kickball.
Taylor Dayne: You have eaten an entire jar of maraschino cherries in one sitting.
Haircut 100: You have killed a moth with a badminton racquet.
George Michael: You have brushed a cat with a ping-pong paddle.
Coil: You have a geode on your desk or bedside table.
’Til Tuesday: You can draw a star in LOGO.
Laurie Anderson: You can draw a cat playing a mandolin in LOGO.
Jan Hammer: You have had a body part other than your hand stuck in a vending machine.
Zapp & Roger: Your favorite candy bar is Big Hunk.
Christopher Cross: You have made a necklace out of strawberry Charleston Chews.
Rockwell: You have eaten more than thirty Circus Peanuts in one sitting.
The Power Station: You have temporarily fused your jaw shut with a Milk Dud or Now & Later.
Lita Ford: You have made out with someone who was dressed as Barbarella or Ms. Pac-Man.
Whitesnake: You have thrown a dirt clod at an ice cream truck.
Guns ’n Roses: You have caught air on a tricycle.
Autograph: You have hit a piece of fruit with a baseball bat.
Oingo Boingo: You own a piece of clothing made entirely out of elastic.
Was (Not Was): You own a piece of clothing made entirely out of feathers.
Bow Wow Wow: You have used the corner of a Guatemalan blanket as a coffee filter.
Kenny Loggins: You have filled every square on a Lite Brite.
Olivia Newton-John: You have broken up with someone via Lite Brite.
The Knack: You have burned your lips kissing a Lite Brite.
Adam Ant: You have spilled Rumple Minze on an algebra test.
Alphaville: You have inadvertently fantasized about Mega Man.
Level 42: You have written and destroyed several pages of Kid Icarus fan fiction.
Tom Tom Club: You have fought off a seagull or crow with a messenger bag.
Squeeze: You have had several hats stolen by dogs.
Cabaret Voltaire: You have cut the hood off a sweatshirt while trying to cut your own hair.
Poison: You have quit a job via Yahoo Messenger.
Motley Crüe: You have tackled a dog into a patch of iceplant.
Great White: You have spilled Mr. Pibb on a mascot costume.
Heaven 17: You have eaten wedding cake and Jagermeister as a meal.
Fine Young Cannibals: You have accidentally swallowed a Lego head.
Debbie Gibson: You have taken a birth-control pill with Zima.
Quiet Riot: You have ridden a tricycle like a skateboard for over a mile.
Skid Row: You have thrown a tricycle at a departing bus.
Exposé: You have put out a menthol cigarette in a bottle of Crystal Light.
Tiffany: You have put out a grease fire with Crystal Pepsi.
Lipps Inc.: You have lost a mood ring in a deep fryer.
Yello: You have dropped a cordless phone into a deep fryer.
Trio: You have kicked a Hacky Sack into a deep fryer.
Plimsouls: You have dropped a handful of Micro Machines into a deep fryer.
Juice Newton: You have accidentally fried a large part of your sleeve or hair.
Vangelis: You have poured Malibu rum over instant oatmeal.
Enya: You have sprinkled bath salts on popcorn.
Def Leppard: You have used a package of lunch meat as a pillow.