The squeaky wheel gets the grease—that one right there, which is making all the noise that you’re complaining about. No, forget it, it’s not worth getting a new one and unloading all the food just for five more minutes of shopping. It’s such a production, getting groceries with you. Like, something always goes wrong. I’m not saying this is your fault; I’ve just noticed we can’t get through a trip to the supermarket without a problem of some kind—forgetting the shopping list or spilling something or seeing someone you don’t want to run into. That’s all I’m saying.
NEW BOOK ALERT
What the world needs is a 680-page, three-pound humor anthology. KEEP SCROLLING TILL YOU FEEL SOMETHING: TWENTY-ONE YEARS OF HUMOR FROM McSWEENEY’S INTERNET TENDENCY is now available for preorder.
November 18, 2013
As little as $1 a month ($12 a year!) goes a long way towards supporting our editorial staff and contributors while keeping us ad-free. Become a McSweeney’s Internet Tendency patron today.