McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Articles by
Teddy Wayne
Teddy Wayne is the author of the novels Loner, The Love Song of Jonny Valentine, and Kapitoil. He writes the Future Tense column for the New York Times.
Photo by Kate Greathead
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December 28, 2018More Appropriate White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner Jokes for 2019
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September 26, 2018A Time Traveler Goes Back in Time to the Birth of Baby Hitler But Gets the Wrong Baby
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April 12, 2018GOP Retirement Announcement Template
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February 2, 2018Monologue: I’m Some Guy’s Ill-Informed Political Twitter Thread
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November 30, 2017The World According to Trump
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October 25, 2017247 Ball: Luxury Gentrification in an Up-and-Coming Neighborhood!
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October 12, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Comedy II
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September 14, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Forgiveness
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August 24, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Home
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July 14, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Comedy
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June 22, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Presence
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June 12, 2017We Are All Living In a Computer Simulation
Trending 🔥
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January 2, 2019I Don’t Hate Women Candidates — I Just Hated Hillary and Coincidentally I’m Starting to Hate Elizabeth Warren
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December 29, 2018List: If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers
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January 4, 2019I Watched the Video of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Dancing In College, and Now I Understand the Necessity of Free-Market Economics
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January 9, 2019I Used My Wife’s Vibrating Dildo to Achieve My First Prostate Orgasm and Now I’m In Narnia and I Can’t Get Back Home
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January 15, 2019It’s Time to Take Up Arms In the War Against Toxic Masculinity
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January 15, 2019Dick Portraiture for the Renaissance Gentleman
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January 15, 2019List: 12 Ways My Book Club Can Tell I Definitely Read War and Peace
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January 15, 2019Open Letter: An Open Letter to the Mathematical Community