Articles by
Teddy Wayne
Teddy Wayne is the author of the novels Loner, The Love Song of Jonny Valentine, and Kapitoil. He writes the Future Tense column for the New York Times.
Photo by Kate Greathead
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April 6, 2017Self-Care Ideas for President Trump
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April 4, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Measurements
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March 10, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Priorities
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February 22, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Striking
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February 7, 2017Grok’s Press Conference
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February 3, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Laughter III
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January 4, 2017Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Journeys
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November 28, 2016Every News Article for the Next Four Years
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November 7, 2016
The Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy -
October 10, 2016Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Generals
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September 13, 2016That Time I Published a Personal Essay On the Internet
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September 12, 2016Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Credit
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October 20, 2009It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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October 10, 2018My Common App Essay: “Every School Reading This Except Dartmouth Sucks Ass”
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October 8, 2018Matreon: The Patreon Platform for Emotional Labor
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October 12, 2018I Am Sick and Tired of Constantly Being Bullied for My Extreme Wealth and Political Power
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October 16, 2018The Complete Guide to Cleaning Your Grout
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October 16, 2018Dispatches From a Guy Trying Unsuccessfully to Sell a Song in Nashville: Dispatch 47: Hulking Victrola
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October 15, 2018Please Purchase My Personal Data From Me Directly
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October 15, 201819 Things to Know About Me, the Gay Male Sidekick in a Romantic Comedy