Teddy Wayne is the author of the novels Kapitoil and The Love Song of Jonny Valentine.
BY TEDDY WAYNE
“Carpe diem” is the name of my new seafood restaurant that specializes in the day’s catch of fresh carp. I know, the e on the sign is a mistake. We’re seeing about having them change it, or at the very least, getting a discount. In a way, we’d almost rather get the discount now, because the misspelling makes us stand out a little, and also we overspent on the sign and could really use the money. You don’t want to know how much we spent, seriously. Starting a restaurant is a huge investment; it’s no wonder so many of them fail. You know, the more I think about it, the more I realize this was a really stupid idea. I should’ve socked the money away for the future, in a slow-growing but consistent bond, instead of impulsively plowing my life’s savings into a restaurant all because I felt like it one morning… Okay, we’re closing. That’s how I like to do things—I make quick decisions and just go for it.
SUGGESTED READSHow to Make Your Own Proverbs
by Russell Bradbury-Carlin (1/8/2004)
List: Rethinking Horse Proverbs
by Joseph O'Brien (5/3/2004)
Obscure Chinese Proverbs
by Dennis Mahoney (11/9/2004)
RECENTLYDo You Have a Child or Have You Just Been Followed Home By a Hyena?
by Kira Jane Buxton (8/23/2016)
List: Facebook Posts by People You Went to High School With Scavenger Hunt—Election Edition
by Derrick Fenner (8/23/2016)
Rebunking Conspiracy Theories: Technology Suppression
by Keaton Patti (8/23/2016)
POPULARClassic College Movies Updated for the Adjunct Era
by Shannon Reed (8/19/2016)
No One is Sadder Than I Am About the Most Recent Celebrity Death
by Pete Reynolds (8/18/2016)
A Poem About Your University’s Brand New Institute
by Susan Harlan (8/10/2016)