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Articles by
Chris Brotzman
Chris Brotzman is an advertising and humor writer based in Chicago. He lives with his roommate, Amazon Echo’s Alexa.
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May 25, 2018This Is Our Obligatory-Yet-Disingenuous Commercial Saluting the Military
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December 31, 2016An Obituary for 2016
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July 22, 2016These Smart Swimming Trunks Automatically Remind You to Be Self-Conscious!
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June 24, 2016Social Media Intern Wanted at The Night’s Watch
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October 30, 2015Are You a Basic Witch?
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June 23, 2015Do You or Do You Not Want to Work at This Glory Hole, Ethan?
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March 10, 2015I’m America’s Latest Politically Divisive Issue
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November 25, 2014The First Friendsgiving
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October 1, 2014This Week on As the World Tinders
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April 22, 2014I’m a 4-Billion-Year-Old Microbe On an Asteroid Heading Straight Toward Earth and I’m So Excited to Hang Out, You Guys
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March 26, 2014Hey Everyone, I’m Going to Have a Loud Phone Conversation On This Crowded Bus
Trending 🔥
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August 24, 2020Frog and Toad Tentatively Go Outside After Months In Self-Quarantine
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November 11, 2020Say “Megan Follows Is the Best Anne of Green Gables” or I’ll Beat the Living Shit Out of You
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November 18, 2020
Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1- 995 -
November 12, 2020Meet Olivia! The COVID-19-Era American Girl Doll
Recently
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November 23, 2020Congratulations to Ourselves on Defeating the Pandemic from the College’s Associate Vice President of Self-Congratulation
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November 23, 202033 Everyday Tasks That Are Easier with a Penis
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November 23, 2020Dan Kennedy Solves Your Storytelling Problems: Episode 2
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November 23, 2020Ernie’s Kitchen Has New Ownership, a New Menu, and Is Now a Luxury Condominium Complex