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Articles by
River Clegg
River Clegg is a comedy writer living in Brooklyn. He contributes to McSweeney’s, The New Yorker, The Onion, ClickHole, and others. Eel enthusiast.
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September 25, 2018A Day In the Life of a Social Media Influencer
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June 26, 2018You’re Meditating Wrong
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October 24, 2017The Lost Journals of Blackbeard
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July 26, 2017If You Give a Poor a Doctor
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July 13, 2017New Wall Street Sculptures
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May 15, 2017This.
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April 14, 2017Church Glossary
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February 1, 2017I Intend to Keep Scrolling Until I Feel Something
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December 1, 2016My Lies, Translated
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August 14, 2015FAQ: Personal Branding
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July 15, 2015Classic Jokes Explained
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April 16, 2015Which Ad Experience Do You Prefer?
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March 26, 2021An Excerpt from My New Anxiety Dream Where I’m Blocking the Suez Canal
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April 2, 2021The Party of Family Values Would Like to Expand the Definition of “Family” and Also of “Values”
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March 22, 2021Job Posting: Assistant Professor of Robotics and Animal Husbandry with a Specialization in Dance
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March 29, 2021New and Improved Updates to Slack
Recently
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April 9, 2021An Open Letter to My Children Regarding the Commencement of Asynchronous Parenting
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April 9, 2021The Five Stages of Grief When Dealing With No Longer Being Able to See the “Scoop, There It Is” Geico Commercial
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April 9, 2021For Your Return to the Office, We’ve Added Three Rooms for Guttural Screaming
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April 8, 2021The Hallmark Channel Presents: Shirley Jackson’s “The Lottery”