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Articles by
River Clegg
River Clegg is a comedy writer living in Brooklyn. He contributes to McSweeney’s, The New Yorker, The Onion, ClickHole, and others. Eel enthusiast.
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November 29, 2019The First Black Friday, by William Bradford
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September 25, 2018A Day In the Life of a Social Media Influencer
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June 26, 2018You’re Meditating Wrong
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October 24, 2017The Lost Journals of Blackbeard
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July 26, 2017If You Give a Poor a Doctor
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July 13, 2017New Wall Street Sculptures
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May 15, 2017This.
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April 14, 2017Church Glossary
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February 1, 2017I Intend to Keep Scrolling Until I Feel Something
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December 1, 2016My Lies, Translated
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August 14, 2015FAQ: Personal Branding
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July 15, 2015Classic Jokes Explained
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September 3, 2020Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1-889
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September 22, 2020It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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September 14, 2020I Appreciate Your Concern, But Our Enormous Wedding Was Socially Distanced
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September 14, 2020I Like My Men Like I Like My… (2020 Edition)
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September 25, 2020Unfortunately, We Will Not Be Pausing the Apocalypse for Election Day
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September 25, 2020We Are the 56 Tubs of Clorox Wipes You Bought At the Start of the Pandemic
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September 25, 2020The New Bill & Ted Movie Is More Chilling for What It Doesn’t Say About Trump Than What It Does
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September 24, 2020Editorial Template For Every Time a Grand Jury Acquits a Police Officer