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Articles by
Walter Carson
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September 10, 2020All the President’s Book Deals
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March 3, 2020Who Said It: Donald Trump or Larry Vaughn, the Mayor of Amity Island from Jaws?
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March 25, 2019Screw You, Losers! Our Narcissistic, Corrupt, Racist, Anti-Science, Transphobic, Sexist, Classist, Nationalistic, Serial-Lying Adulterer President Didn’t Collude With Russia to Help Win an Already Gerrymandered Election!
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November 13, 2018Thanks for Sharing Your Unsolicited and Negative Opinion On the Internet!
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June 12, 2018Excerpts From My Son’s 6th Grade Report on the Endocrine System
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June 1, 2017Set List for the Band at President Trump’s Rose Garden Speech Announcing the United States Pulling Out of the Global Climate Accord
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October 20, 2016Phrase Uttered by Donald Trump in Last Night’s Debate or Title of Classic Cheesy Pop Song?
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December 15, 2015Trump’s Other Doctors Weigh In
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December 9, 2014Thoroughly Modern Milton
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November 19, 2014Jaden Smith, Willow Smith, or William Blake?
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March 31, 2011April Fools’ Day Pranks to Play On a 20-Something Male Who Still Lives at Home With His Parents
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June 17, 2010Conference Realignment
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February 19, 2021I’m a Short Afternoon Walk and You’re Putting Way Too Much Pressure on Me
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February 22, 2021The UX on this Small Child Is Terrible
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February 24, 2021I Oppose the Democrats’ Plan to Lower Child Poverty. If Kids Want to Eat, They Should Work In Filthy Factories Like They Did in the Good Old Days
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February 16, 2021As a Superhero Teacher, I Can’t Wait to Sacrifice My Unvaccinated Life for Your Child
Recently
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February 26, 2021The Cure’s “Friday I’m in Love” for Nihilists
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February 26, 2021As a Staunch Defender of American Liberty, I Refuse to Let Trans People Infringe on My Rights as a White, Straight, Cisgender Congresswoman from Georgia
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February 26, 2021You’re Having a Bad Trip, Charlie Brown!
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February 25, 2021714 Epidemiologists on When We Can Resume Fixating on Petty Bullshit