Articles by
Walter Carson
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June 1, 2017List: Set List for the Band at President Trump’s Rose Garden Speech Announcing the United States Pulling Out of the Global Climate Accord
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October 20, 2016List: Phrase Uttered by Donald Trump in Last Night’s Debate or Title of Classic Cheesy Pop Song?
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December 15, 2015Trump’s Other Doctors Weigh In
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December 9, 2014List: Thoroughly Modern Milton
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November 19, 2014List: Jaden Smith, Willow Smith, or William Blake?
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March 31, 2011List: April Fools’ Day Pranks to Play On a 20-Something Male Who Still Lives at Home With His Parents
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June 17, 2010List: Conference Realignment
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May 11, 2009Hot New Styles In Face Masks
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February 12, 2009List: Thoughts I’ve Had While Watching Intervention That Could Possibly Be Red Flags
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April 4, 2018Fifty-Six Questions for Young MC Upon Hearing “Bust a Move” for the First Time in Twenty-Two Years
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April 10, 2018List: Horoscopes for Librarians
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March 19, 2018I’m Going to Close This Deal Using Business Words I’ve Heard Men Yell in Airports
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April 6, 2018We Deeply Regret Hiring the Perpetrators of the Salem Witch Trials as Opinion Columnists
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April 19, 2018A Poem About Your University’s Absolute and Unwavering Appreciation of Its Faculty in Spite of Said Faculty’s Crap Salaries
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April 19, 2018List: Things I, an Affluent White Cis Male, Have Gotten Away With In a Starbucks
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April 19, 2018The Diary of a Settler of Catan
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April 18, 2018The First Female President