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All posts tagged
homeland-security
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December 6, 2019The Department of Homeland Security’s Preparedness Guide for Your Ten-Year High School Reunion
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April 9, 2019At the End of the Day, Pinhead and Lady Misery Simply Had Different Definitions of “Defilement,” and That’s Why She’s Leaving The Cenobite Order
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May 11, 2012The State Department’s Official Travel Advisory for Your Mother’s House
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November 18, 2010A Message From a TSA Full-Body Scanner
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March 23, 2007Locations on My Person Where It Is Possible to Hide a Machete, According to the TSA Employee Who Patted Me Down at Flint Bishop Airport, in Flint, Michigan
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August 23, 2004The A-Team Resolves Lapses in Homeland Security
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August 3, 2004Featured Attractions at This Year’s Department of Homeland Security Pep Rally
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May 13, 2022Ten Possibilities the Applebee’s Waitress Considers Before It Occurs to Her the Women in Booth Fourteen Might Be a Couple with Two Children
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November 13, 2018If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers
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May 18, 2022A Passenger’s One-Star Review of the Trolley Ride from the Trolley Problem
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May 13, 2022A Modest Proposal for Solving the Baby Formula Shortage
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May 20, 2022How Oizys, Greek Goddess of Misery, Spends Her Sundays
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May 20, 2022My Prediction That Political Attacks Against Me Will Escalate Has Nothing to Do With Me Exposing Myself to a Flight Attendant
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May 20, 2022Diseases All Woodmont Alumni from 1971 to 2021 Should Immediately Be Screened For
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May 20, 2022Babies Need to Pull Themselves Up by Their Tiny Bootstraps