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November 18, 2020Welcome to Dog Influencer Heaven
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July 17, 2020Captions to Use on Baby’s First Instagram After a Heinously Long Fertility Journey
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April 4, 2020
McSweeney’s April Instagram Readings -
January 22, 2020I Turned My Passion Into My Dream Job and Now I Sell Small Hats to Iguanas On Instagram
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January 10, 2020What Your Instagram Filter Says About Your Perspective On the Inevitability of Death
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October 22, 2019An Open Plea to My Instagram Acquaintance
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October 17, 201911 Ways You Are Superior to VSCO Girls
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April 24, 2019Popular Thirst Traps Throughout History
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March 12, 2019Did I Mention That I Am Not On Social Media?
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September 25, 2018A Day In the Life of a Social Media Influencer
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January 14, 2021I Am the Designer of This Restaurant’s Outdoor Seating Space, and This Is My Artist’s Statement
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January 20, 2021
Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1-1,056 -
January 13, 2021Excerpts from the Sex and the City Revival in Which Samantha Is Replaced with Fran Lebowitz
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January 21, 2021I Am a Disappointed Biden Voter Who Was Told He’d Immediately Implement Communist Rule
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January 26, 2021High School Theater Bingo
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January 26, 2021How to Potty Train Your Child If a Basilisk Lives in Your Toilet
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January 26, 2021
Excerpts from McSweeney’s Quarterly: The Introduction to McSweeney’s 62: The Queer Fiction Issue -
January 26, 2021I’m Being Censored, and You Can Read, Hear, and See Me Talk About It in the News, on the Radio, and on TV