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All posts tagged
kidnapping
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February 18, 2020We Have Exciting Deals On Your Child’s School Photos — We Also Have Your Child
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November 22, 2019If You Ever Want to See Your Grandchild Again, You’ll Subscribe to Our New Streaming Network
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May 17, 2017Sorry This Note is Written With Cut Out Magazine Letters, But I Have Your Daughter
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December 8, 2016We Kidnapped Real People, Not Actors, to See What They Thought of the All-New 2017 Chevy Equinox
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May 27, 2014iTunes Terms and Conditions Written By a Person Being Held Against His Will
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March 14, 2014Give Me Back My Husband! At Some Point!
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May 22, 2013Captive Audience SEO
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March 8, 2004Sestina: She Used a Funnel
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May 26, 2000Humor Beginning With an Excerpt From a Newspaper
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September 3, 2020Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1-889
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September 22, 2020It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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September 14, 2020I Appreciate Your Concern, But Our Enormous Wedding Was Socially Distanced
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September 14, 2020I Like My Men Like I Like My… (2020 Edition)
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September 25, 2020Unfortunately, We Will Not Be Pausing the Apocalypse for Election Day
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September 25, 2020We Are the 56 Tubs of Clorox Wipes You Bought At the Start of the Pandemic
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September 25, 2020The New Bill & Ted Movie Is More Chilling for What It Doesn’t Say About Trump Than What It Does
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September 24, 2020Editorial Template For Every Time a Grand Jury Acquits a Police Officer