McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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All posts tagged
pets
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March 3, 2008Observational Notes for the Veterinarian Regarding My Dog Hank
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July 31, 2007A Billet-Doux From Your Goldfish
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June 8, 2007FAQ for Dogs
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October 2, 2006An Open Letter to My Sister’s Psychotic Dogs
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September 22, 2006An Open Letter to My Cats, Who Are Jealous of My New Baby Daughter and Are Acting Out Now That She Receives All the Attention
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May 19, 2006An Open Letter to the Amazon Parrot I Have Been Supporting for Over 15 Years Who Still Tries to Bite Me for No Apparent Reason
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May 18, 2006The Garter Snake in 11-Year-Old Kevin Wackerbarth’s Terrarium
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May 11, 2006David Caruso Scolds His Cat About Its Lackadaisical Litter Box Use
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May 10, 2006Jokes by Brian Beatty: Pet Theory
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April 4, 2006An Open Letter to My Cat, Abbie
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April 25, 2025This Five-Hundred-Word Bumper Sticker on My Tesla Explains Why I’m Not a Bad Person
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May 5, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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April 21, 2025Getting Ahead of It: JD Vance Almost Definitely Didn’t Kill the Pope
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April 29, 2025Don’t Worry, We Were Prepared for Our Policies to Be Extremely Unpopular, Because They Are Very, Very Bad
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May 8, 2025Chekhov’s Gun, Applied to Motherhood
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May 8, 2025Letters to Moms: A Letter to Back to the Future’s Lorraine Baines-McFly
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May 8, 2025An Open Letter to Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Who Thinks My Daughter is a Tragedy
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May 7, 2025The Bells of Trader Joe’s: A Quick Reference Guide for Front-End Crew Members