mfBardot101: Hey – I’m changing jobs.

mfBardot101: Got approached by a zealous headhunter who organized an interview at another law firm. It’s smaller, but the money is SO much better.

DarthSinatra: Age.

mfBardot101: I’m not even in such a good mood – I’m kinda bored. Gave my first notice of resignation (in my life, that is) last Friday. I cried like a fool in front of one partner. Can you believe it?

DarthSinatra: Unimportant.

mfBardot101: Wha?? You perceive me as a crybaby?

mfBardot101: I got emotional – I don’t even know why. It was so embarrassing.

DarthSinatra: Head.

mfBardot101: What about it? Do you want some?

mfBardot101: Haha. Sorry – dirty joke.

DarthSinatra: Small and round.

mfBardot101: Anyway, I saw you online and thought I’d check in, get the scoop.

DarthSinatra: Eyes.

DarthSinatra: Green.

mfBardot101: Throw me a bone, will ya?

mfBardot101: Sorry to bug you. You must be leaving soon.

DarthSinatra: Complexion.

mfBardot101: ?

DarthSinatra: White.

mfBardot101: Huh?

DarthSinatra: Hair.

mfBardot101: Yo.

DarthSinatra: Yellow.

mfBardot101: That is such a racist thing to say.

DarthSinatra: Features.

mfBardot101: ?

DarthSinatra: Mobile.

DarthSinatra: Neck.

mfBardot101: What the fuck are you talking about?

DarthSinatra: 13 3/4".

DarthSinatra: Upper arm.

mfBardot101: You got a man for me or something?

DarthSinatra: 11".

mfBardot101: What are you talking about?

mfBardot101: Hmmm?

DarthSinatra: Forearm.

mfBardot101: Come on.

DarthSinatra: 9 1/2".

mfBardot101: Hey.

You’ve been warned by mfBardot101. Your warning level has increased from 0% to 20%.

DarthSinatra: Wrist.

mfBardot101: I don’t get it

DarthSinatra: 6".

mfBardot101: Whose measurements are these?

DarthSinatra: Bust.

mfBardot101: You have one too?

DarthSinatra: 34".

mfBardot101: So we are talking about a chick?

mfBardot101: Man, you are SO chatty today.

DarthSinatra: Waist.

DarthSinatra: 27".

mfBardot101: It’s like I hardly have time to read you, you’re writing so fast!!!

DarthSinatra: Hips, etc.

DarthSinatra: 35".

mfBardot101: Ok.

You’ve been warned by mfBardot101. Your warning level has increased from 20% to 30%.

DarthSinatra: Thigh.

mfBardot101: Come on, Chris.

mfBardot101: That’s not fair.

DarthSinatra: 21 3/4".

mfBardot101: What is this about?

mfBardot101: You appear, not so transparently, to be making a jab at me, which is a regretful thing.

DarthSinatra: Knee.

mfBardot101: You are driving me nuts.

DarthSinatra: 13 3/4".

mfBardot101: Is this like that movie “Weird Science”?

mfBardot101: I know this isn’t me, b/c my eyes aren’t green.

mfBardot101: But some of this stuff is close to me.

DarthSinatra: Calf.

mfBardot101: I know you still think that I lied. Human relationships and not wanting to hurt others make people lie every single day. People tell each other they look good when they think the opposite, etc. All because we live in a civilized society where people’s feelings are taken into consideration.

DarthSinatra: 13".

mfBardot101: I am sorry you still feel this way.

mfBardot101: It’s too bad we can’t just be friends.

DarthSinatra: Ankle.

mfBardot101: I am terribly sorry about any pain I may have caused you.

DarthSinatra: Instep.

You’ve been warned by mfBardot101. Your warning level has increased from 30% to 40%.


mfBardot101: Pretty please?

DarthSinatra: 8 1/4".

mfBardot101: You’re an asshole.

mfBardot101: Sorry. Don’t mean to be a bitch. My grandfather just died and I haven’t been myself lately.

DarthSinatra: Unimportant.

mfBardot101: WHAT?!!!!

DarthSinatra: Height.

mfBardot101: Ok. So you’d rather never hear from me again?

mfBardot101: You are angry.

DarthSinatra: 5’ 4".

mfBardot101: I just want to bury the hatchet.

DarthSinatra: Weight.

mfBardot101: Look, If you’d rather I NEVER IM you again, just say so.

DarthSinatra: 123 lbs.

mfBardot101: I’m just trying to have a friendly chat with you. Is that so troublesome? Sometimes people need to let water under the bridge before being able to communicate again.

mfBardot101: What is wrong with you? You can’t handle this?

mfBardot101: Sorry. Sorry about bothering you. Bye.

mfBardot101 Signed off at 6:31 p.m.

DarthSinatra: She stormed away from the callbox, accompanied delightedly by her hips, etc.