[CHERYL and ADAM sit on a designer couch in their West Village apartment that they can afford even though they don’t really seem to work. SARA enters.]

SARA: Steve broke up with me!

ADAM: Aw, sweetie, there are plenty of fish in the sea.

CHERYL (gesticulating with a Bop It): Which makes it statistically unlikely you’ll ever find your perfect match.

SARA and ADAM (hands on hips, smiling): Cheryl!

- - -

[CHERYL and SUSAN shop for lavish dresses even though it’s not really clear whether they have jobs that pay them enough to afford this lifestyle. DAVE enters.]

DAVE: Well, it’s over. Jill said she never wants to see me again!

SUSAN: It’s not you; it’s her.

CHERYL (chewing almost too much gum): Ya, and how she feels about you.

DAVE and SUSAN (hands on hips, smiling): Cheryl!

- - -

[CHERYL and DONNIE pick at a muffin while luxuriating at a café that always has space for them, no matter how busy it gets. It must be a weekend, cuz it’s obviously the middle of the day and they gotta have jobs, right? STACEY enters.]

STACEY: Bob dumped me!

DONNIE: You’re better off without him.

CHERYL (rubbing magazine perfume samples on herself): Unless partnership was something you enjoyed.

STACEY and DONNIE (hands on hips, smiling): Cheryl!

- - -

[CHERYL and TIM dig into a lavish brunch, including several cocktails each. We haven’t seen them work once and they don’t seem to have any passive income, so maybe they have rich parents or something? DONNA enters.]

DONNA: Brandon and I broke up!

TIM: It’s his loss.

CHERYL (smoking a lipstick-stained cigarette indoors): Ya, he lost the burden of dating you!

TIM and DONNA (hands on hips, smiling): Cheryl!

- - -

[CHERYL and JONNY walk down Fifth Avenue holding numerous bags of clothes. It’s 2 p.m. on a Tuesday and they just mentioned that they don’t get any money from their parents. How are they carrying so much Dior?! SASHA enters.]

SASHA: It’s over between me and Pat!

JONNY: Good! You deserve better.

CHERYL (looking over from a conversation on a giant cell phone): And he deserves much better!

SASHA and JONNY (hands on hips, smiling): Cheryl!

- - -

[CHERYL and LIZ are at work. They’re finally at work! They do have jobs! It’s weird that they share the same desk, but whatever, at least we know they make a living somehow. ZOEY enters.]

ZOEY: Zach and I are through!

LIZ: It’s okay, honey; everything happens for a reason.

CHERYL (trying to sharpen a pencil in the mouth of a Furby): And the reason is you!

ZOEY and LIZ (hands on hips, smiling): Cheryl!

[CHERYL, LIZ, and ZOEY leave the office and take a nine-hour lunch break.]