“Disrupt Texts is a crowd-sourced, grassroots effort by teachers for teachers to challenge the traditional canon in order to create a more inclusive, representative, and equitable language arts curriculum that our students deserve.”
– #DisruptTexts co-founders Tricia Ebarvia, Lorena Germán, Dr. Kimberly N. Parker, and Julia Torres
“So you’re saying we should ban classics?”
– white people, mainly
1. Every student should have the life-altering experience of reading Moby-Dick CliffsNotes.
2. If we don’t teach classics, kids will only want to read graphic novels about pansexual witches.
3. “Inclusive” means white men too, up to the last 8%!
4. Frankly, “Orwellian” sounds better than “Atwoodian” or “E. Butlerian.”
5. Are you saying we should ban James Baldwin and… the other guy?
6. Hawthorne was an OG feminist, the only bro not cool with slut-shaming! Fuckin’ A!
7. Without classics, how will we celebrate how far white men have progressed in how they portray Black women?
8. On the contrary, some of my best friends have read books by queer intersectional authors!
9. It’s not exclusion per se, it’s just that very few BIPOC writers had access to a quill.
10. I don’t see color, I just see the greatest thinkers of our time — who happen to be white through no fault of their own.
11. Classics are timeless! Friend-zoning is just as psychologically damaging now as it was when The Great Gatsby was written.
12. Without classics, how will we learn the rich linguistic history of ways to call women whores?
13. Contemporary books are too depressing. Bloodbaths in the final act are my jam.
14. How about if we just interrupt texts with a few poems by rumored lesbians?
15. Without classics, how will we appreciate how emotionally complex heterosexual men can be when they don’t have wars to fight or marlins to catch?
16. Would it sway you to know that there is compelling evidence that Shakespeare spooned with a dude?
17. Lord of the Flies will help us teach students about the insurrection and white supremacy on the DL so no one gets fired.
19. Without classics, how will we guide future global citizens in developing white savior complexes?
20. Some texts are more equal than others.
21. This is Man vs. Silencing of Man!
22. Pre-order my collection of essays, Ishmael is Calling: Why Classics Matter Now More Than Ever!