Maybe Colonel Sanders wasn’t really all that interested in cooking. Maybe everything — the secret blend of herbs and spices, the down-home persona, the hundreds of franchisees — was a cover for the fact that he had a deep, abiding, and pathological hatred of hens.
McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Join our Patreon at $10/month (or more) and receive a coupon for a discount on the Decorative Gourd Beanie, Gourd mugs, and our glorious new Advent Calendar. Help support our writers and keep our site ad-free.
Please help support our writers and keep our site ad-free by becoming a patron.
Suggested Reads
-
October 23, 2008Dan Liebert, Verbal Cartoonist: The Story of Wendy’s
-
January 30, 2014On the Trail of Mary Jane: Winner Winner, No Chicken Dinner
-
April 22, 2002Students’ Responses to a Quiz on McDonald’s, Presented as Evidence That I Might Not Be Cutting It As an American Culture Teacher at a College in Ningbo, China
-
March 4, 2005Things You Don’t Expect to Find on a McDonald’s Reader-Board Menu
Trending 🔥
-
November 6, 2024I Don’t Hate Women Candidates. I Just Thought an Erratic and Vindictive Criminal Was Worthier of My Vote Than a Woman Candidate
-
November 1, 2024I Will Be Away from My Desk on November 6
-
August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
-
November 6, 2024Here’s Why a Second Death Star Won’t Be That Bad