Reversible 4-Piece
Comforter Set

Settle in for a night of restlessness and anxiety under this plush, soft microfiber comforter set. The striped pattern reverses to a complementing design, so you can switch up your bedding decor whenever you want to feel like you’re in control of at least one aspect of your life. Created with a contemporary pattern and oversized construction, this set will make a lovely addition to any bedroom, bunker, or makeshift shanty. Available in California King, Full, King, Queen, and Twin. – $55.99

Velvet/Berber Down
Alternative Comforter Set

Cuddle up, stay warm, and call your loved ones under this splendid comforter set. Designed with the lush feel of velvet and a berber down reverse, this ultra-soft bedding promises to provide a partial respite from the panic and shame of being part of the American electorate. Just try to be disgusted by the direction of our country when you see this expertly finished double needle top-stitch. Hypoallergenic. – $39.95

Traditional Sateen Cotton 12-Piece
Bed in a Bag with Sheet Set

Adorned with a grey and black medallion motif, this bed in a bag screams elegance and sophistication. So you may want strip the mattress when the militia arrives to purge the college-educated. With a coordinating 350-thread count cotton sheet set, this comforter will serve as a much-needed reminder that the only thing more important than civil liberties is good taste. Machine washable. – $119.95

Seven-Piece Classic
Woven Comforter Set

Whether covering your queen-sized mattress or wadded into a tear-soaked ball in your bathtub, creating a bedding design is a cinch with this seven-piece comforter set. The alternating red and brown color scheme will strike a bold look for any bed or resistance flag, and the luxurious synthetic fabric means this material won’t be confiscated during war-time rationing. Includes a comforter, bedskirt, shams, and pillows. – $84.99