Frightening Offspring of Various Grains - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

Internet Tendency

Daily humor almost every day since 1998.

Daily humor almost every day since 1998.

Celebrate the 15th Anniversary of “Decorative Gourds” with the brand new It’s Decorative Gourd Season Beanie!
See in our store.

Children of the Corn

Scions of the Spelt

Offspring of the Oats

Tykes of the Teff

Quiddies of the Quinoa

Those Barley Bastards

Fright’ning, Filial, and Fulla Farro

Please help support our writers and keep our site ad-free by becoming a patron.

Become a patron

Subscribe to McSweeney’s Internet Tendency’s Substack

Suggested Reads

October 31, 2016

Reminders for Our Upcoming Team-Building Trip to the Forest of the Damned

by Madeline Jacobson
January 4, 2006

Scary Moments in Human/Robot Relations in Nonchronological Order

by Geoff Haggerty
April 18, 2005

Scenes From The Undead Big Chill

by Ross Murray
October 18, 2023

Rom-Com Titles That Also Work for Horror Movies

by Ysabel Yates

Trending 🔥

September 20, 2024

It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers

by Colin Nissan
September 30, 2024

Faculty, Rejoice: Gmail Can Now Translate “Deanspeak”

by Jane G.
August 19, 2024

Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056

by Ben Parker, Stephanie Steinbrecher, Kelsey Ronan, John McMurtrie, Sophia DuRose, Rachel Villa, and Amy Sumerton
October 2, 2024

JD Vance, a Very Normal Human Man, Sells Used Cars

by Sam Woods

Recently

October 11, 2024

I Wish I Went Before Mary Shelley in This Storytelling Contest

by Mike Drucker
October 11, 2024

270 Reasons: Because Kamala Harris Can Say the Word “Abortion”

by Lauren Groff
October 11, 2024

Brutally Honest Instructions for Visiting a Pumpkin Patch

by Gracie Beaver-Kairis
October 10, 2024

Why Kamala Harris Must Secure the Endorsement of Sabnock, the Great Marquis of Hell

by Martin Nolan