“Wiseguys from the East, if you’re listening, I hope you’re able to find the Christ child who is missing. I think that you will probably be rewarded mightily by our scribes.”


“It was not necessary for me to respond to statements made in the ‘Gospels’ about me, some of which are total bullshit & only given to make the other person look good (or me to look bad). This was an Illegally Started Hoax that never should have happened.”

“The Good News Media is doing everything possible to stir up and anger as many people as possible seldom mentioning the fact that the Gospel According to Matthew has as its principle conclusion the fact that there was NO COLLUSION.”

“These are Angry People, including the highly conflicted Sain’t Matthew. They won’t even look at all of the bad acts and crimes on the other side. A WITCH HUNT LIKE NO OTHER IN ANCIENT HISTORY!”

“Is Sain’t Matthew ever going to release his conflict of interest with respect to King Herod, including the fact that we had a very nasty & contentious business relationship, I turned him down to head the HPI (High Priest of Israel).”

“I thought I was doing something very good for our Kingdom by using Herodium, in Judea, for hosting the Second Triumvirate Leaders. It is big, grand, has tremendous ballrooms & meeting rooms.”

“Began phase one of my yearly physical. Everything very good (some people say Great!). Will complete next year.”

“Sadly, it looks like Jerusalem’s chief priests and Pharisees are unable to stop the Caravan heading to the Eastern Gate. Criminals and unknown Middle Easterners are mixed in. I have notified Pontius Pilate and Military that this is a Regional Emergy. Must change Laws!”

“So ridiculous. Christ must work on his Anger Management problem, then go to a good old-fashioned chariot race with a friend! Chill Jesus, Chill!”

“You know what we used to do in the Old Testament days when we were smart, right? The conspirators and treason, we used to handle it a little differently than we do now.”

“I love the Second Temple of Jerusalem, one of the most beautiful buildings (temples) I have ever seen. But Sloppy Josephus said I called it a dump — TOTALLY UNTRUE”

“Egypt will pay for the Western Wall!”