1.
Leaving a voicemail
On your Senator’s phone line
Calling him “spineless”

2.
How would we settle
Our disputes if it weren’t for
Duel by combat?

3.
My AirBNB,
While open to our dear troops,
Still charges full price

4.
It’s pretty fun to
Say “Am I under arrest?”
To a cop (Good luck!)

5.
“Remain silent” speech:
A crime-show climax staple
That never gets old

6.
When your lawyer shouts
“Objection!” your murder trial
Will feel so worth it

7.
Anything can be
Skipped if you just pretend you
Have jury duty

8.
Prison doesn’t seem
Quite so bad when compared to
Drawing; quartering

9.
After drafting eight,
Picture Madison going,
“Uh…and so on lol”

10.
Technically implies
The right to party. Eat your
Heart out, Beastie Boys