Where are you in the line?
- Near the tostadas and beer shelf (not too bad)
- By the flowers (it’ll be hours)
- I’m not sure where they’ve wedged us but we’ve gone around twice
What are you buying today?
- Peanut Biscotti
- Pumpkin Brittle
- Pumpkin Cranberry Crisps
Other customers who bought those items also bought:
- Pumpkin Joe Joes
- Pumpkin Scone Cookies
- Pumpkin Body Butter
Are you a basket or cart Trader Joe’s shopper?
- Basket
- Cart
How heavy is your basket, if you’re a basket person?
- Not that heavy
- Very heavy
Which side of the line are you waiting in?
- Right
- Left
How is that line moving?
- Fairly well
- Other line is faster
How do you feel while you’re
at the front of the first line
waiting to be directed by the feeder
to one of the three checkout lines.
- Confident; it will go smoothly
- Impatient; feeder is not paying attention
- Annoyed; certain you’ll be sent to the slowest line
Other customers in the Yellow checkout line felt these ways:
- Tired of holding basket
- Hopeful of soon being given a cashier number
How are you feeling?
- Tired
- Hopeful
Where do you live? Enter your address and birthdate:
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How do you feel about just having shared that?
- Business as usual
- Not good
Which checkout line are you in?
- Green
- Yellow
- Red
Rate the experience of this line:
- 4 stars: Loving it. Best line tonight.
- 3 stars: Eh. I’ve had better red-pepper-line experiences.
- 2 stars: That idiot at the front is cutting ahead.
- 1 star: People walk so slowly to the cashiers. I fucking hate this.
Rate your shopping experience overall:
- 4 stars: Took a while, but got what I needed.
- 3 stars: Eerily friendly cashier weirded me out; there was hardly any bagged lettuce left.
- 2 stars: Constant gridlock. Teeth gritted the whole time.
- 1 star: Anarchy. Like the ending of Lord of the Flies.
Upload your most recent tax return here:
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Thank you for shopping at Trader Joe’s!
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