Articles by

eli grober

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Eli is a writer living in New York City and sometimes Los Angeles. He is a former staff writer for The Tonight Show. His writing has appeared in The New Yorker, McSweeney’s, and his diary. To read more of his work, subscribe to his newsletter.

May 12, 2020

Here’s How Time Works Now

by eli grober
April 28, 2020

I Went Back In Time to Stop All This, But I Ended Up Giving It to Everyone Way Earlier, and Now It’s a Lot Worse

by eli grober
April 10, 2020

Hi, I’m Jesus, And When I Get Back, I Want All The Eggs Hidden

by eli grober

Trending 🔥

July 20, 2020

Another Dull Quarantine Weekend at Home, Target, Chipotle, Home Depot, and Our Niece’s Graduation Party

by Katherine Shonk
July 10, 2020

Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1-796

by Ben Parker, Stephanie Steinbrecher, Kelsey Ronan, John McMurtrie, Sophia DuRose, Rachel Villa, and Amy Sumerton
July 31, 2020

Teacher

by Erin Nicole
July 22, 2020

Advanced Calculations for Women in Heterosexual Relationships

by April Soetarman

Recently

August 4, 2020

Reasons My Baby Will No Longer Be Wearing a Diaper in Public

by Lisa Argyle
August 4, 2020

Sharpies

by Jen Coleman
August 4, 2020

It’s Time to Let the Serfs Return to the Fields

by Stefan Sirucek
August 3, 2020

Bartleby, the School Superintendent: A Story of Reopening

by CB McClintock