ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Eli Grober
Eli is the author of the satirical essay collection This Won’t Help, listed on the New Yorker’s “Best Books We Read This Week.” He writes the humor newsletter Here’s Something.
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January 24, 2022“We Need to Get Back to Normal,” I Say, While I Continue to Live My Life Normally, As I Have Throughout This Pandemic
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January 14, 2022Here’s How Time Works in 2022
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December 13, 2021Here at Time Magazine, We’ve Decided This Is One of Those Years We Pick a Person Who Sucks
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November 4, 2021I Am Totally Against Critical Race Theory, and Furthermore, I Have No Clue What It Is
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October 28, 2021I Am Proud to Announce That Starting Today, Our Company Still Sucks Shit
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October 1, 2021“We Should Absolutely Tax the Rich,” I Say as I Sail Away on My Yacht
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September 28, 2021Why I’m Doing My Own Research Before Using a Seat Belt
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September 9, 2021Neo, You Can Take the Blue Pill or You Can Take the Red Pill. Either is Fine, Honestly. Just Don’t Take the Ivermectin
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August 5, 2021We Will Do Anything to Get You to Work for Us Except Pay You Enough
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June 16, 2021How I Saved Enough to Buy a House with My Parents’ Money
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May 20, 2021The Completely Normal, Totally Reasonable Unwritten Rules of Baseball
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April 22, 2021I Will Gladly Explain Why I Hate The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Just As Soon As I Finish Reading All 22 Pages
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November 29, 2023Your 2023 WebMD Wrapped
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December 4, 2023The National Lyrics or Things My Dad Says While Refusing to Check Google Maps?
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February 23, 2012Lines from The Princess Bride That Double as Comments on Freshman Composition Papers
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November 28, 2023Please Buy Tesla’s Cybertruck, Which Is Cool, Not Stupid