Reservations must be made for the exact number of people in your party. If there are thirteen of you, you are not allowed to make a reservation for twenty-six just so you can all sit on one side of the table.

Speaking of which, your party must sit on both sides of the table.

Customers must order more than just bread and water, which are both free. This rule stands even if you plan to turn your free water into wine.

Patrons are no longer allowed to pretend dishes are parts of their body (i.e., bread is their body, wine is their blood). It is disturbing to other guests, and insulting to the chefs.

We no longer allow guests to wash each others’ feet inside the restaurant. We actually never allowed this to begin with, but some customers took advantage of the fact that we didn’t explicitly state this rule anywhere. Wash your feet and your friends’ feet at home.

We ask that customers not refer to their meal here as their “last supper.” We hope to be in business for a long time, and we’d love to have you back. Plus, it’s super ominous and freaky to say around other guests.

No group portraits during dinner service.

Please remain seated during your meal and refrain from standing and gasping, even if a member of your party reveals that one of you will betray him. This is a simple courtesy for other guests who don’t plan on betraying anyone.

Finally, this should go without saying, but you must pay for your meal. Even if you die for all our sins the next day, you’re still on the hook for your tab.