“How do I produce dopamine upon detecting your pheromones? Let me count the ways …” p. 37

“I shall not compare thee to a summer’s day, given the imprecision of nonliteral, subjective representations of the natural world …” p. 47

“Let me not to the marriage of true minds admit that the dramatic increase in the Western male’s lifespan from 1950 to the present has rendered superfluous the average 25.7 years of marital cohabitation that must be negotiated post-child-rearing, child-rearing being the primary evolutionary impetus behind the persistence of monogamous tendencies in frontal-lobe circuitry …” pp. 56–78

“Love is patient. Love stimulates mammalian brain attributes associated with care-giving and species survival …” p. 80

“My mistress’ eyes exist in a symbiotic relationship with the sun, the former filtering solar emissions for the purpose of fixing circadian rhythms whilst transmitting data to the optic nerve …” p. 86

“O rose, thou art bearing a recessive genetic defect that inhibits thine immune system from purging the secretions of sawfly larvae …” p. 97

“What lips my lips have kissed, potentially exposing their cracked surfaces to herpes simplex virus 1 …” p. 112