MCSWEENEY'S QUARTERLY SUBSCRIPTIONS
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Articles by
Jory John
Jory John is a New York Times bestselling author of books for both children and adults. He is a two-time E.B. White Read-Aloud Honor recipient. Jory’s books include All my friends are dead, Penguin Problems and Goodnight Already!, among many others. He can be found at joryjohn.com.
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July 19, 2018Animals Got Problems: You Can’t Choose Your Family
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July 6, 2018Animals Got Problems: We All Have Our Secrets
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June 21, 2018Animals Got Problems: Every Day is a Struggle
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April 16, 2018They Told Me My “Hive Mind” Posts on Facebook Could Be Solved With a Little Googling, But I Prefer to Stick to My “Hive Mind” Posts on Facebook, Thank You Very Much
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March 19, 2018What is Blip and Why is Everybody Talking About It?
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December 22, 2016I’m an Excellent Conversationalist on Airplanes
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November 22, 2016I Wonder if Everybody at This Thanksgiving Dinner Party Knows I’m Vegan
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September 9, 2016Son, Don’t Make Any Weird Faces During This Sporting Event or You’ll Probably Become an Internet Meme
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April 29, 2016Vanna White at Three in the Morning
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November 12, 2015Maybe I Should Stop Bringing Up My Cat So Much When People Tell Me Stories About Their Kids
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October 23, 2015In Retrospect, Maybe I Shouldn’t Have Been So Quick to Move Out of Mark Zuckerberg’s Harvard Dorm Room
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September 24, 2015Sometimes I Have Conflicting Emotions About Having Invented the Internet
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March 27, 2024Class Is Canceled Until Further Notice While I Do My Job
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April 5, 2024I’m the Draft List at This Brewery and No, You Can’t Have a Light Beer
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April 3, 2024Emails from My Dentist That Would Actually Make Me Schedule an Appointment
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March 2, 2022Selected Negative Teaching Evaluations of Jesus Christ
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April 17, 2024The Boys Are Back in Town (for Johnny’s Funeral)
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April 17, 2024What I Thought My Life Would Be Like After Decanting All My Spices into Mason Jars
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April 16, 2024We Are Not a “School”—We Are a Hospital System with a Football Team
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April 16, 2024How to Roast Your Friend Just Enough That They’ll Want to Remain Your Friend