McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Articles by
Wendi Aarons
Wendi Aarons is the creator of @paulryangosling, and writes USWeekly Fashion Police, travel reviews and essays for various other places. Mostly she writes notes left on cars parked by assholes. She’s lived in Austin, Texas for 20 years and hopes you don’t move there. She’s finishing her first middle-grade novel right this very second.
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October 22, 2018List: How to Turn Any Conversation Into One About the Midterm Elections
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October 3, 2018List: More Trump Cocktails for Every Occasion
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August 22, 2018Dorothy Parker, Social Media Influencer
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August 14, 2018List: Other Transportation Metaphors Besides “Helicopter Parent”
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July 16, 2018List: The 6 Books Donald Trump is Reading This Summer
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June 6, 2018Ferris Bueller’s Laid Off
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May 16, 2018I’ve Decided This Sex Cult Just Isn’t a Good Fit
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April 18, 2018List: Who Said It: Middle-Aged Woman or Teenage Boy?
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March 19, 2018I’m Going to Close This Deal Using Business Words I’ve Heard Men Yell in Airports
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February 23, 2018Fifty Candles
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December 1, 2017List: Things to Do at Work Besides Showing Your Penis to Coworkers
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October 10, 2017List: Conversation Starters for Parents Driving the Middle School Carpool
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November 13, 2018List: If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers
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October 20, 2009It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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November 5, 2018Can You Find the Hidden Images In These 15 “Magic Eye” Photos?
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October 31, 2018Why It’s Too Difficult For Me to Vote, and How Many Beers I Can Butt Chug In Under 60 Seconds
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November 14, 2018Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs Revised for Modern Civilization
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November 13, 2018So, You’re About to Turn 40: A Memo From Your Media or Tech Company’s HR Department
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November 13, 2018List: If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers
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November 13, 2018Thanks for Sharing Your Unsolicited and Negative Opinion On the Internet!