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All posts tagged
elections
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July 22, 2024Sherwin-Williams Paint Color or Potential Kamala Harris Running Mate?
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June 20, 2024What I Would Do If I Got Off the Roof of This Office Building and Were Elected President
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March 29, 2024How to Concede an Election While Making It Clear That Your Ideas Are Objectively Better
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February 14, 2024As President, I Will Champion Gen X Rights
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November 7, 2023A Concession Speech by a Candidate Who Just Lost to a Dog Mayor
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October 24, 2023We Must Give Equal Airtime to the Democratic Incumbent and the Guy Who Wants Everyone to Drink Their Own Piss
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November 7, 2022Are You Watching Election Night Coverage or Preparing for a Colonoscopy?
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November 4, 2022I Pledge to Accept the Results of the Election as Long as I Win
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November 3, 2022What the Hell Else Has to Happen for You to Get Off Your Butt and Vote?
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November 2, 2022Repeat After Me: “The President’s Party Always Loses the Midterms”
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July 15, 2024I Can’t Believe Such a Hateful, Violent Act Could Happen in the Hateful, Violent Era I’ve Created
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July 12, 2024Schedule of Speakers for the 2024 Republican National Convention
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July 16, 2024Hillbilly Elegy Edited for J. D. Vance’s Vice Presidential Campaign
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May 10, 2024What Your Favorite ’90s Band Says About the Kind of Bored Suburban Mom You Are Today
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July 26, 2024I’m a Childless Cat Lady, and If Trump and Vance Win I’m Going to Start a Sexual Relationship with My Couch
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July 26, 2024Skills You Need as President of the United States or Skills You Need as a Stepmom?
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July 26, 2024If They’d Told Me We Were Poor, I Wouldn’t Have Tolerated the Cynics
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July 26, 2024We Went Ahead and Made an AI Olympian