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All posts tagged
elections
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October 24, 2023We Must Give Equal Airtime to the Democratic Incumbent and the Guy Who Wants Everyone to Drink Their Own Piss
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November 7, 2022Are You Watching Election Night Coverage or Preparing for a Colonoscopy?
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November 4, 2022I Pledge to Accept the Results of the Election as Long as I Win
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November 3, 2022What the Hell Else Has to Happen for You to Get Off Your Butt and Vote?
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November 2, 2022Repeat After Me: “The President’s Party Always Loses the Midterms”
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October 31, 2022If Elected, I Promise to Murder You
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October 14, 2022A Voter’s Guide to the 2050 Election, Written by Your New Robot Overlords
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November 29, 2021I’m Running for Congress Because It’s the Only Way I Will Be Able to Receive Paid Family Leave
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June 8, 2021I Am a 9-Year-Old Practicing Cursive Handwriting, and if the Constitution Let Me Run for Office I’d Have the Boomer Vote Locked Up
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November 2, 2020Our Election Night 2020 Predictions
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July 3, 2025We at Mountain Dew Would Like to Apologize for Our Role in the Destruction of American Democracy
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July 3, 2025Pay No Attention to the Big Beautiful Bill Behind the Curtain
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July 2, 2025Advice from Your Conservative Neighbor on How You, a Liberal, Can Hang an American Flag Without Looking Like a Trumper
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