mnemonics

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “The mainstream media creates scandals to help ratings. Networks race for commercial dollars—celebrating hysteria and commissioning ‘junk journalism.’”

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Lazy judges & hypocritical lawyers frequently justify unfair rulings by jailing serial jerkoffs.”

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Let’s all invite an Onondaga Indian (AKA “pagan savage”) in and badger him about Jesus. Wartime atrocities aside… let’s become apostles!”

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “America should obviously keep killing terrorists. That’s retribution, baby!”

Non-Essential Mnemonics: Actually, Some White Men CAN Jump. Trampolines Prevent Racially Biased Athleticism

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Only losers—probably Presbyterians or their fellow Calvinists—find religious services that go after brunch palatable.”

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Sporty lesbians get extremely competitive when playing softball. They make mountains outta molehills—often making women cry following bad losses.”

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Before conservatives fawned over him, ‘Mormon Mitt’ never waxed presidential.”

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Occupational proctologists are proficient bottom probers and butt pluggers. Orthopedic nurses are nice, but not ‘anal business’ nice.”

Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Remember Bernie Mac? That guy made people laugh by combining standoffishness and slapstick—nuanced performances rarely repeated since.”