These woods are mine, behind my home
At last, I’ll get some time alone
They will not see me stopping here
My fellow Americans on their cellphones.

I spoke too soon! I think I see
Someone emerge behind that tree
I think they’re pulling out cameras
In these here woods, for a selfie?

Oh god, I thought this was my break
I ask, “Did I make a mistake?”
Coming here into the woods
To be alone for my own sake

Lovely to meet you, at first I’ll say
I have somewhere to be, if that’s okay!
I’m in a rush, but one picture is fine
Or two I can take on this nice day.

Now, my dogs and I must say adieu,
But thank you all for stopping through.
Oh, we’re not done? There’s someone else?
You want a selfie? Who are you?

I’ve stepped into the woods this eve
To walk my dogs, enjoy the leaves
So, I really should get back to them
But I’ve enjoyed thi – oh, I don’t believe

Another one hiking in these woods?
Okay, a quick selfie, I guess I should.
Seriously, how did I not know this?
How popular is this neighborhood?

I’m sorry, I’m tired, and I really must go,
I’ll take my dogs back to my home.
I’ll just put my fleece on and say goodbye
Perhaps, I’ll try again tomorrow.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
To myself, that I can sleep,
Everyone, please let me sleep.