Let’s go around the room and introduce ourselves.
Let’s go around the room and feel a rush of adrenaline as your mind races into a panic about which movie, superpower or most recent accomplishment you’re going to mention.
Let’s dart our eyes around the room, searching for the nearest exit.
Let’s go around the room and pretend you just got an urgent text message on your phone.
Let’s go around the room, cross our arms, and find a spot on the ceiling to stare at.
Let’s go around the room and email a personal bio to the instructor, telling her to read it whenever but never, ever mention it again.
Let’s go around the room and hug a large pillow against your stomach and rock back and forth so slowly it’s imperceptible to the naked eye.
Let’s go around the room, open Twitter, and write a 32-tweet thread about our most traumatic childhood experiences.
Let’s go around the room and imitate “normal people,” but actually be imitating robots. Make sound effects like “bleep bop boop” or “nanner nanner.” Laugh heartily but make no sound.
Let’s go around the room and share your favorite animated gif by holding up your phone and pointing to it (no one will be able to see it but they’ll all still nod and smile).
Let’s go around the room, pop in your air pods, press play on your favorite podcast and smile enthusiastically because it’s like you’re right there in the room with those gals and they really feel like they’re your best friends. Because they are.
Let’s go around the room and wonder why you’re like this.
Let’s go around the room and awkwardly clear your throat, barely whisper your name, then whip your head to the person next to you so fast you strain your neck. Then remember you totally forgot to say your name. You didn’t actually say anything. Think about interrupting the next person so you can try to say your name again, then come to the conclusion that maybe it’s better no one knows your name right now.
Let’s physically go around the room, find your own special corner, and remain there for the duration of the class.
Let’s go around the room, shrug your shoulders and silently mouth the one-word question running through your mind, such as “What?!” or “Why?!” or “Really?!”
Let’s go around the room and say if you’re a Carrie, Charlotte, Samantha, or Miranda, then remember we’re all Miranda, then judge the Miranda-ness of the person to your left. Is she the more uptight Miranda from the earlier seasons, or is she the more chill Miranda after she realized Steve was her person? Decide she’s the more uptight Miranda. Move on.
Let’s go around the room and look at the extrovert in the room. That’s right, it’s the instructor, Marla. She said she was once an introvert like us but she changed and she can change us, too. Wonder how many people she’s killed.
Let’s go around the room and already start mentally planning how many of these sessions you’re gonna skip.
Let’s go around the room and wonder why you signed up for this class. Oh right, to get out of your comfort zone. Berate yourself mercilessly.
Let’s go around the room and… wait, everyone left.