Pay toll collector in pennies.

Hide road signs from others.

Yield, but in a manner that suggests that you are being highly inconvenienced.

Stop for yellow lights.

Yield to pedestrians, infuriating motorists.

Roll down window, tell pedestrians you stop for that you admire their efforts to lose weight.

Refuse to pass cyclists.

Refuse to yield to cyclists.

Refuse to RSVP cyclists.

Hazard lights on all the time.

Stop and get out of car to read road signs you haven’t stolen.

Adhere bumper sticker to back of car that complains of everyone else’s driving.

Flatten own tire.

Drive at the speed limit.