Oh my god, we are so old. You know how some people are young? We’re not, we’re old.

I just can’t get over how old we are. Who ever thought we’d be in our mid-20s? When we were 19, we felt old, but we weren’t. Now we’re SO OLD.

Can you believe we’re out of college already? Like, we went to college, and then we graduated? Can you believe we graduated? Even though we went to colleges with 98% graduation rates, I still never thought we’d graduate. We’re SO old.

We’re not like other girls. Other girls are young girls. We are old girls.

Eight years ago we were 18-year-olds in high school. Now we’re 26-year-olds in the real world. Can you believe we went from 18 to 26 in just eight years? That’s INSANE. We’re so old.

I wish there were a number I could use to describe how old we are. Like, yeah, I could say our age, but that doesn’t really capture it as well as saying that we’re ‘SO old.’

There are literally celebrities who are younger than us. Like, half the cast of Riverdale. Can you believe we’re older than actors who play 16-year-olds? When Gossip Girl came out, they were all older than us, but now we’re older than them. We’re old.

Remember when we were young? It feels like yesterday, because it was. But now we’re old. We’ve lived a life. We’ve left the country to study abroad during college, and then again as a graduation present. We’re not like those young kids whose parents don’t give them money to travel. We’re old.

Let me give you an example of how old we are. We went to the farmers’ market, and they told us we might prefer the aged brie. Have you ever even heard of someone who needed even their BRIE to be aged because of how old they are? We might break a record for who can eat the most aged brie in one sitting, because we ate a lot of it. And we’re aged. Aged, as in old.

It’s literally unfathomable how old we are. Like it’s impossible to articulate. I know someone who had a baby on purpose! Can you imagine us having babies someday? People we know might die soon. Isn’t that sad, but also insane? We could die tomorrow, and that’s only true because we’re old, since we definitely couldn’t die young, because we’re already not young. We missed the chance to die young. We can’t be teen moms! We are so old.

My grandma is 96. She’s also like out-of-control old.