MCSWEENEY'S QUARTERLY SUBSCRIPTIONS
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Articles by
Chas Gillespie
Chas is a writer, comedian, and teacher whose work appears in The New Yorker, The Onion, and McSweeney’s, where he contributes regularly. Feel free to reach out to him through his website, chaschaschas.com. He is currently at work on a novel.
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September 13, 2018Welcome to Zilloe, Which Is the Same as Zillow But Only Includes Houses You Can’t Afford In Places You’ll Never Live
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July 2, 2018A Brief Word Regarding Our Air Conditioning Policy
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April 3, 2018Life is a Comedy
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January 15, 2018I Think All People Should Be Treated Equally, Regardless of Whether Their Skin is White or Purple or Green or Black or Black or Black or Black or Black
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August 16, 2017It Gives Me Great Pleasure to Introduce, for the First Time, @JenniferMarkTrueLove
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June 6, 2017I Feel OK About Turning My Back on the Poor, Elderly, and Vulnerable Because I Really, Really Want to Own a Helicopter
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April 13, 2017Don’t Date Someone From Work
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January 3, 2017Have More Empathy!
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November 11, 2016A Note to My Fellow Trump Supporters
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October 17, 2016I’m One of Those Nice Guys
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April 7, 2016Welcome to My Cynical Anarcho-Communist Bake Sale
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November 11, 2015I’m Taking My Child to Toddler Yoga So That When He Grows Up He Will Conquer the Fucking World
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March 27, 2024Class Is Canceled Until Further Notice While I Do My Job
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April 5, 2024I’m the Draft List at This Brewery and No, You Can’t Have a Light Beer
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April 3, 2024Emails from My Dentist That Would Actually Make Me Schedule an Appointment
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March 2, 2022Selected Negative Teaching Evaluations of Jesus Christ
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April 17, 2024The Boys Are Back in Town (for Johnny’s Funeral)
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April 17, 2024What I Thought My Life Would Be Like After Decanting All My Spices into Mason Jars
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April 16, 2024We Are Not a “School”—We Are a Hospital System with a Football Team
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April 16, 2024How to Roast Your Friend Just Enough That They’ll Want to Remain Your Friend