McSweeney's Quarterly Subscriptions
“A key barometer of the literary climate.”
—The New York Times
Articles by
Jason Roeder
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August 6, 2020Announcing the First Grocery Store for Patriots Who Refuse to Wear Masks
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January 3, 2020“Welcome to Year Zero!”: A Post-Apocalyptic Gossip Column
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October 28, 2019Your Haunted Studio!
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April 30, 2019Making Friends After 400
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August 12, 2016So You Want to Ride On My Party Boat?
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August 9, 2013Let’s Welcome Cathy!
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April 29, 2013A Letter to My Unborn Cheeseburger
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February 28, 2012An Apology From Vassar
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June 29, 2011Ladies and Gentlemen: It Is Party Time at Club Seacrets!
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August 24, 2010Ask the Sexperts
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June 11, 2009The Bachelor Party: What You Need To Know
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April 3, 2009Advice From a Person With a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology: Column No. 5
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January 14, 2022What Your Favorite Sad Dad Band Says About You
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January 5, 2022A Note of Reassurance from Your School District Regarding Our Updated Omicron Policies
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December 31, 2021Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
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January 10, 2022How We Will Separate You from Any Lingering Hope and Other Important Topics of Today’s Faculty Meeting
Recently
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January 26, 2022Our School District’s New Emergency Preparedness Guidelines Are Based on the Book of Revelation
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January 25, 2022The Biggest Issue Facing America Right Now Is People Stealing Puffy Jackets from Multi-Billion Dollar Corporations
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January 25, 2022Mrs. Dalloway Said She Would Buy the Rapid COVID Test Herself
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January 24, 2022“We Need to Get Back to Normal,” I Say, While I Continue to Live My Life Normally, As I Have Throughout This Pandemic