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Articles by
Sam Weiner
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June 26, 2020What Your Car Dealer Says and What He Really Means
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July 12, 2019They’re Still Freedom Fries to Me
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May 24, 2019Why Superman Sucks
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April 26, 2019Why I’m Leaving Marvel Universe’s New York
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December 14, 2018Oprah’s Favorite Things, Unedited
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August 27, 2018Yes, I Built an Exact Replica of the Bar From Cheers In My Basement and No, You Are Never Coming Down Here!
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December 4, 2017Your Mass Shooting Thoughts and Prayers Are Accidentally Going to the Angry God of a Distant Planet
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September 20, 2017Who I Am, In Order
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February 21, 2017Welcome to Hillcrest: A Non-Judgmental, Non-Denominational Church of the Serpent
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October 20, 2016Award Certificates for Modern Adults
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March 31, 2016“Liquor Before Beer?” The Ultimate Drinking Cheatsheet
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February 9, 2016A Taxonomy of Naps
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September 2, 2021Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
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September 7, 2021A Short Quiz for My Students in Lieu of Asking About Their Vaccine Status or Requesting That They Wear Masks
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October 9, 2009It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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September 8, 2021Wake Up, Sailors, Scurvy Is a Hoax
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September 17, 2021Our Faculty Success Initiative Redefines Everything You Thought You Knew About “Faculty” and “Success”
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September 17, 2021Adam and Eve Decide Who Should Be in Charge of Childbirth