ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Sam Weiner
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April 1, 2024The Riddle Master Hits Middle Age
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April 5, 2022The 1%: We’re Just Like You
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June 26, 2020What Your Car Dealer Says and What He Really Means
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July 12, 2019They’re Still Freedom Fries to Me
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May 24, 2019Why Superman Sucks
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April 26, 2019Why I’m Leaving Marvel Universe’s New York
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December 14, 2018Oprah’s Favorite Things, Unedited
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August 27, 2018Yes, I Built an Exact Replica of the Bar From Cheers In My Basement and No, You Are Never Coming Down Here!
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December 4, 2017Your Mass Shooting Thoughts and Prayers Are Accidentally Going to the Angry God of a Distant Planet
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September 20, 2017Who I Am, In Order
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February 21, 2017Welcome to Hillcrest: A Non-Judgmental, Non-Denominational Church of the Serpent
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October 20, 2016Award Certificates for Modern Adults
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July 15, 2024I Can’t Believe Such a Hateful, Violent Act Could Happen in the Hateful, Violent Era I’ve Created
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July 12, 2024Schedule of Speakers for the 2024 Republican National Convention
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July 16, 2024Hillbilly Elegy Edited for J. D. Vance’s Vice Presidential Campaign
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May 10, 2024What Your Favorite ’90s Band Says About the Kind of Bored Suburban Mom You Are Today
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July 26, 2024I’m a Childless Cat Lady, and If Trump and Vance Win I’m Going to Start a Sexual Relationship with My Couch
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July 26, 2024Skills You Need as President of the United States or Skills You Need as a Stepmom?
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July 26, 2024If They’d Told Me We Were Poor, I Wouldn’t Have Tolerated the Cynics
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July 26, 2024We Went Ahead and Made an AI Olympian