Lists

Comments My Father Made to the TV

An Incomplete List of Admonitions, Disclaimers, and Braggadocios Appearing on the Cardboard Sleeves of Thirty-Three and One-Third Revolutions Per Minute Microgroove Long-Playing Phonographic Records

Grout-Related Phrases Written on the Grout in a Bathroom Stall (Most Likely Written While Sitting on the Toilet)

Reasons You’re No Longer Fit To Be an Architect

Yngwie Malmsteen or Spinal Tap?

Jim Croce’s List of Things It Would Be Imprudent to Do

Remembered Items Bid During an Apparently Drunken but Lucid Game of High Stakes Verbal “Trivia Poker,” as Overheard During Observance of the Leonid Meteor Showers, High Atop Skyline Boulevard in the Hills of Oakland, California

Lyrics from Bob Dylan Tunes or Poorly Translated English on Japanese Food Packaging?

TV Guide Movie Capsules, Heaven Edition

Certain Foods and the Individual Utensils it is Difficult to Eat Them With

Fluid-Related Terms Indicative of a State of Grace, Mostly from Various Obscure Religions

Titles of Rock Songs Covered on Barbra’s Rock Album, Butterfly, or “Barbra’s Statements” from barbrastreisand.com